A Moment's Hesitation Changes Everything
by Achilles1011
Summary: Bo was about to throw the dog collar back at Lauren when it slipped from her hand, and as it fell she felt her resolve beginning to slip as she begins to questions the actions she was about to take. How one moment's change can alter the course of an entire future. Set during 1x08 Vexed


**A/N: Thank-you for taking the time to read this, it was just something that popped into my head a long time ago when I was watching Vexed. Let me know if you want this to be continued or not. **

* * *

"Don't forget your dog collar." She spat at Lauren, holding the _thing_ in front of her. How could she have been so naïve?

How could she have been so stupid to think that she could maybe, just maybe have a chance with this woman in front of her? A future?

That she could trust this woman with her hopes, her dreams, her wants and her desires?

How could she be so naïve and so trusting?

All she was, all she ever had been, was a tool. Used a manipulated by someone she thought that she could trust. But she had been to naïve, of course, she always thought the best of people, always trusted them.

That had obviously been a mistake here. Now it was time for her to go and find the answers that she had been looking so long for. Now it was…

"Bo." She heard Lauren call out her voice cracking, eyes shinning with barely suppressed tears. There was this normally strong and stoic woman standing in front of her wrapped in nothing but her bed sheet, her eyes looking at her, shinning with barely suppressed tears.

She hesitated for a moment, holding the mark in her hand, she was ready to throw it at Lauren, to cause her even a fraction of the pain that she was feeling in her heart right now.

The necklace fell out of her grip, and clattered back onto the floor. The moment it did she knew.

It would be so easy for her to bend over and retrieve it, for her to bend over and pick that dog collar up off of the floor and to throw it at Lauren, to tell her not to forget that thing as she kicked her out.

For her to walk away from this moment and for her to and find those answers that she so desperately sought.

She looked up at Lauren who was staring at her, those damned big brown eyes, conveying a thousand things to her that she wanted to ignore.

A thousand emotions that she wanted to just ignore and pretend were not reflecting back at her in those eyes.

To pretend that Lauren had done this without thought and without emotions. That she had done this out of necessity or out of callous cruelty, to accomplish something for her master.

But she couldn't. She couldn't do it.

She couldn't stand there and pick the necklace back up and then throw it at Lauren.

She couldn't revel in the pain that it would cause, of the look of shock and betrayal, of sadness that would surely reflect back at her in those big brown eyes. That would make her feel so much better. Even if it was only petty revenge.

But she couldn't. She couldn't.

She was angry; she felt used, manipulated and betrayed by someone she thought she could trust. She wanted to inflict one-tenth the pain she was suffering on this woman.

But she couldn't.

She couldn't because she was weak. She wasn't strong enough to look at Lauren like this and just walk away from her, to throw that necklace back at her and defile her in a way, to remind her that she was indeed owned.

That she was nothing more then a slave, a tool to be used and manipulated as others pleased.

She couldn't.

Because Lauren was human.

Nobody owned her.

She laughed humourlessly; she was so pathetic and weak. This woman, this woman had a grip on her heart didn't she?

Goddamnit! She was starting to fall in love with this woman wasn't she!

She looked up at Lauren who was staring at her eyes wide and so obviously shinning with tears.

She still felt betrayed, used, and manipulated by this woman. But if she looked into Lauren's eyes nothing about this was false.

If Lauren had been using her, if this had been nothing to her then she would not be standing in front of her in tears would she?

No, she wouldn't be. She wouldn't be.

Lauren was naked except for that sheet physically and her heart was naked and vulnerable to wasn't it? She had trusted it to Bo, and she could choose to crush it in revenge like she so wanted to do, or choose to hold in her hand and treasure it.

The choice had already been made for her hadn't it? She realized as she felt the anger and hate start to fade away. She still felt dirty, used, and manipulated but she couldn't leave Lauren like this, not so open and vulnerable.

She felt a sudden desire to take the doctor into her arms and protect this woman from the world. She knew that Lauren probably didn't need help or saving, but she would be damned if she left Lauren like this, as much as she wanted to hurt her, and to punish her.

She also wanted to take her into her arms and sooth the tears away.

She looked over at Lauren and she smirked slightly. How had this insatiably curious human doctor managed to worm her way so far into her heart without her noticing?

She could see Lauren's eyes widen before she closed them, her shoulders slumping in resignation.

That made her own heart ache in pain.

Vex could wait ten more minutes. The answers she wanted so desperately and the revenge she wanted to take could wait.

Perhaps she should listen to Lauren after all.

Her trust in Lauren may be nearly gone but there was still a smidgen of it left.

Just a smidgen, but for this moment, it may be enough.

She walked over to Lauren, she could see her flinching with every footstep that got closer, her eyes closed as if she was awaiting punishment. What had they done to her? What had they done to Lauren to make her so fearful?

She stopped in front of Lauren for a few moments.

Was this really what she wanted to do? Was this really what she should do?

Should she really comfort this person who made her feel so dirty? So disgusting?

She could feel two halves of her warring. One side so desperately wanted to take her revenge to walk back over to the necklace and grab it, throw it at Lauren like she had been about to do. Or perhaps do even worse to the doctor.

The other part of her, the more rational part of her, pointed out that perhaps Lauren had her reasons for doing this, for seemingly manipulating her. And that maybe this one time, just this one time she needed to stop her conquest and listen.

Stop and listen, learn. New concepts for her. But perhaps just this once.

A third side piped in and noted that a few tears had started to fall down Lauren's cheeks as she stood there, her eyes closed and her body hunched slightly as if waiting for a painful blow.

Hurt or heal?

Hurt one side of her screamed, take your revenge, don't let her get away with making you feel so degraded, so used… so… loved.

Loved.

Shit. She was royally screwed wasn't she? That was part of what she felt when she was with Lauren, love.

Not just love either.

Acceptance.

Support.

Hope.

_Human. _

She was starting to fall for the blonde doctor if she hadn't already.

It wasn't quite love yet, but it was pretty damn close wasn't it?

Her mind was made up.

Heal. Heal this damage, heal this wound. Help this person heal.

She reached her arms out and pulled Lauren into her, wrapping one arm around her waist, splaying her hand wide open. The other coming to cradle her head.

I've got you; she tried to communicate silently as she felt Lauren begin to shudder against her. I've got you.

And I'll be damned if I'm letting you go.

Because somehow Lauren.

Somehow you already are starting to earn my trust back.

You're already starting to make me a little less angry at you.

I'm still hurt, and I still feel dirty.

I still need those answers and want that revenge

But I am also starting to fall in love with you.

And now? Now you have my heart.

Or maybe you have for a long time.

I don't know anymore.

"Shh." She cooed in Lauren's ear. "Shh."

"I'll listen to you okay?" All she could feel was Lauren bury her head in her shoulder.

But it had and now she had promised Lauren that she would stay and listen to her.

So now she had a sobbing Lauren in her arms.

The source of answers about to get away and Lou-Ann may end up dead.

"I l…"

She cut Lauren off. "Not yet. I'm not ready for that yet and neither are you." She whispered, a harsher tone in her voice then she had meant.

"But one day we will be okay? And until then I'm not going to run again and neither are you." Bo sighed and pressed a kiss to Lauren's temple.

For now they were lovers and nothing more, and that would have to be how it stayed.

She laughed to herself at the irony of it all.

Who would have thought dropping the damned dog collar would change everything?


End file.
